Cathy Larson
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May 1st Looms Ahead

4/11/2016

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May 1st is right around the corner, and if you’re the parent of a high school senior, then these next couple weeks are going to be fraught with indecision, anxiety and excitement.

On May 1st, kids around the country finalize their college decision and submit their SIR (Statement of Intent to Register) -- the decision a student unfortunately feels not only defines the rest of his life, but also his identity and self worth.

I wish our kids all had the wisdom to know that college is simply another step in life’s journey, not an end to it.
My thoughts this week are prompted by a student-created comic strip published in my school’s monthly student newspaper. The comic was a simple, horizontal, four-panel strip. Each panel represented one of each of the four years of high school: freshman, sophomore, junior, senior. In each panel is simply a girl sitting at a table, but with each panel her facial expression changes: in panel one she’s smiling, in panel two she’s sad, in panel three she’s crying, and in panel four she’s completely distraught.

What’s most telling in the comic is the thought bubble in each of the first three panels. The first panel’s bubble lists Ivy League universities: Harvard, Yale, Cornell, Princeton and Brown. The second panel’s bubble: USC, UCLA, Berkeley and Duke. The third panel’s bubble: Cypress, CSULB, Riverside and Merced. The final panel, wherein the girl is having a complete meltdown, does not have a bubble at all; she’s too overwhelmingly lost. As her college choices change and evolve, to what she clearly sees as choices less prestigious or renowned, her self worth seems to evaporate as well.

Satire? I’m sure.

Truth? I’m absolutely sure.

The comic makes me so sad. Have we really become a society where our kids believe they are worthless unless they attend an Ivy League university? I’m in no way suggesting that these prestigious universities aren’t worthwhile goals. I am suggesting, however, that attending one of these schools doesn’t define a child.

I want to remind us all to help our kids realize that self worth and identify aren’t defined by the college they attend, because college choice is dependent on dozens of factors: finances, declared major, distance from home, environment, weather, family, readiness, etc.

What really matters is how our kids embrace the experience once they arrive on campus -- regardless the school.
Our kids need to use college to discover themselves, get involved, grow up, find independence, help the community, volunteer to help others, decide on a direction for their future, travel abroad, get curious about life, find a passion, build friendships, master new subjects, play a new sport, become more culturally aware, get political, and, sometimes even, fall in love.

My point? These things can be done on any campus. And it’s these experiences that define character, build identity and create self worth -- traits developed through life itself, not assigned based on the college name on a diploma. All our kids are worthy. They all have something unique to offer the world. We need to help them see the bigger picture.

We need to stop celebrating just a select few; we need to celebrate them all.

May 1st isn’t a day to judge -- it’s a day to celebrate the start of each child’s unique journey.

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What is the purpose of homework?

3/7/2016

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All our kids all have it. They all complain about it. And it drives most family discussions in all households across America. “Do you have homework?” “Is your homework done?” “Why didn’t you turn your homework in?” Over and over and over again on any given night in households with school-aged children, these questions get asked, answered and repeated ad nauseum.

I don’t remember an excessive amount of homework when I was in school. I do, though, explicitly remember doing specific homework assignments, but that’s because I don’t think I did that many. The few I did, therefore, stand out. Weekly, I did a workbook page or two of my foreign language, a short study guide for history, the few math problems I didn’t get done in class, and added finishing touches on English essays. A couple hours a week, maybe? And my husband tells me he did even less than that.

Then education changed, as it always does, and homework became mandatory. Rote. Ubiquitous. Lots of it. Every night. As if the homework itself created rigor and had the power to transform learning. If I had to pinpoint a cause, I would look to No Child Left Behind -- high stakes tests and expectations for kids to know excessive amounts of content knowledge.

With recent changes in standardized testing, current educational reform, and clear parent voices, districts are beginning to rethink the purpose of homework. They are even beginning to place restrictions on the amount of homework kids can be assigned, limiting the amount of time or number of pages sent home each night. The days of “piling on the work” in the name of rigor are being revisited. In professional development meetings, educational research is being disseminated on local campuses, and school faculty are discussing the research findings -- that too much homework can be a detriment to learning.

I say, “It’s about time.”

The research tells us that too much homework causes undue stress. Research tells us that there is oftentimes clear disparity between homework and achievement. Research also tells us that excessive homework results in diminishing returns.

So thank you, local school districts, for having these tough conversations and challenging teachers to reevaluate their status quo.

If your child’s teacher hasn’t yet embraced this new direction in assigning homework, however, I have one question you can ask on your next Back to School Night, Parent/Teacher Conference or Open House to hopefully get your child’s teacher to think more carefully about her practice.

“What is the purpose of your homework?”

Is it given in the name of practice? Is it given to attain mastery of a skill? Is it to introduce new concepts or content? Can less be done with the same result? Is it necessary? Regardless the answer, just make sure the teacher has one. Homework for the sake of homework just isn’t a good enough answer any more.

Imagine your home without homework every night. What might you talk with your kids about instead? What could you do more of as a family? What extracurricular activities would you now get to enjoy? How might your child’s life be more fulfilling? Could all your lives be less stressed? Would there be fewer tears?

Ultimately, more purposeful homework planning on a teacher’s part will create more purposeful living for a child.

Imagine all the free time. What will you do with it?

Anything you want --- and that’s the purpose!

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Why are kids so stressed?

2/22/2016

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‘Tis the season of college acceptance letters -- the culmination of twelve years of blood, sweat, and tears for both kids and parents. My question for the week stems from the stress created by those twelve years. Has it all been worth it?

We have friends whose kids are brilliant, self-motivated, high achievers. And I teach students like this every day at my school. They are inspired, driven and believe they know their path. They want to take as many AP classes as possible, don’t accept anything less than A’s, and are convinced success will only be attained through attendance at an Ivy League university. I also know and work with kids who aren’t this driven; they struggle with self esteem, confidence and achievement. Regardless the type of student, our culture has developed an accepted practice that with all kids come parents who continually push, don’t settle for average and set exceptionally high expectations. Is this undue stress necessary?

Educators are finding that this relentless expectation of perfection is creating a generation of kids who are overly stressed, depressed, and, in the most extreme cases, suicidal.

What are we doing wrong?

Here are my few thoughts about how we can all help students lead less stressful lives.

Find a Balance: I get that the world is becoming more competitive. I also get that not every student is prepared or capable of taking five AP classes in one year. For every hour of an AP class, a student should be preparing an additional two hours at home. There aren’t even enough hours in a day for a student to attack this workload. This also then assumes a child is good at everything -- a brilliant mathematician, insightful scientist, a natural writer and an exceptional historian. Wouldn’t a child’s time be better spent pursuing extra-curricular activities to cultivate other passions: sports, the arts, photography, robotics, friendships, animals, philanthropy, etc. I will argue any day that these activities will ultimately create the most well-rounded, balanced child.

Know the End Game: Let’s extrapolate the stressful school schedule from above. The child takes and passes five or six AP classes. The college awards college credit. The student begins college as a sophomore. Yeah! Or is it? This simply means the child has only three years to find his right fit career. Only three years to enjoy the college life. Only three years until he has to enter the workforce. To what end? To begin the grind of life earlier? I’m definitely sure I wouldn’t recommend that path to my younger self.

There is More Than One Path: How many of us knew exactly what we wanted to study in college? I took an informal poll at work this week during a meeting, and only one-fifth of us are currently working in the field of our first college-declared major. This is normal. In fact, it’s expected. That’s why colleges encourage kids to take General Education courses in the first two years, so they can explore their options. And for those of us who aren’t where we thought we’d be as adults, would an Ivy League education have changed the outcome? Life paths aren’t always just a linear A to B. Most of us meander around the alphabet for quite a while before landing on a perfect fit career. And regardless the college, success is still attainable -- ALL levels of success.

I’m not suggesting as parents we stop raising the bar, stop having high expectations, stop encouraging our kids to be the best they can be, stop pushing them to want to excel.

I am suggesting, however, that we build in some opportunities for them to discover their own purpose of education. Their own passion. Their own way.

I want all students, my own kids included, to give effort and show grit. I want them to work hard. I want them to push to be great.

But I also want their stress to motivate -- not destroy.

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